Friday, 13 August 2010

Fishing with electricty

Over the evening I have tried to fathom for the life of me, what is all this internet lark? Its literal meaning brings no comfort as the inter connection of ‘nets’ provides diddly squat in relation to a computing device. Nets are for fishing you stupid web people; I questioned some of these intertypes within chatting parlours they simply spouted gibberish with what seemed to be a confounding code. I enquired on the connection of these nets and would a trailer vessel be involved. They again belched silly comments at myself such as ‘wot?’, ‘what the hell u on bout?!’ and ‘f**k off’. I quickly responded with vile and temper only to be electronically put to the door and banned from said ‘room’.

My next port of enquiry was that of a forum. This seemed more applicable as I am aware of a forum from Ancient Greek times. I set about asking varying questions of intrigue on what this interfishingnet structure truly represented. Again I was bombarded by abuse I wish never to repeat, at least not in the presence of a priest, but possibly a lady of the night (those sort seem to say anything foul).

I then ventured toward one of these sites of ill repute to gauge whether this was the reason for these connected-seafarers. On arrival I was agasp at the ludeness that was there, and may I add, how no one had informed me. I was amazed by the sheer vulgarity and crept in further. Again I found one of these interweb speak-easys and lurked upon the side lines. To my dismay the only converse was of biscuits and fat woman arguing. On this occasion I hastily retreated, ashamed and disappointed on my lack of knowledge.

A thought of despair crept in as I was stumped for answers. Luckily there was a filthy boy outside my home and I quickly accosted him, “young boy!” I said “what is this internet?” I again spoke with my voice. He was quite perturbed as I had taken him approximately 4ft in the air, recognising my folly I lowered the crane. After a hefty bribe with the lawmen, I have decided to take to asking the readers of this journal entry.

What is this internet I hear of?

A shining penny for your answers.

Yours Faithfully

Dr Populus MD

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